Becoming a Power Couple in Relationship

Becoming a Power Couple in Relationship

This Blog Post and video is about an approach to healing relationship, whether it’s a long-established relationship or a new one.

It’s in two parts:

Part 1 describes a useful approach to handling and healing our problem love scripts in relationship whether its long established or brand new

Video Part 1:

Part 2 gives you some fascinating examples of some specimen examples of insights from both the vastness of Vedic Astrology and also Psychodynamic Western Astrology as to how the insights from these two combined can be such a useful guide helping is to develop the needed identification of the challenges to love and relationship for ourself and our partner.

Video Part 2:

Part 1: An Approach to Healing Our Relationship Negative Scripts

The approach came to me from a book I heard about, by chance, from someone on one of my Sacred West of Ireland Tours. I’d not heard of the book or the author before, but reading the book left me seeing a vivid image of a process whereby a couple can lovingly agree to identify and share and heal their negative behaviour patterns: how they can identify the patterns which harm their relationship, and then work then lovingly work together to heal these patterns.

OK, so, the book I heard about by chance is by an English Mythologist and Storyteller called Martin Shaw and its title is: ‘Courting The Wild Twin’.

And the key dramatic image I was left with from the book – an image that I have tested out in the year since with a number of individuals and couples, is that a couple  can, in a sense, see themselves like two snakes lying next to each other, and the key fact to be aware of here is that:

Snakes shed their skins.

Snakes shed skin after skin – and so in a sense, they are ‘reborn’.

I’m mentioning this useful image because it can become the basis of a process – a process for lovingly agreeing to shed our negative love scripts: shedding negative skin after negative skin.

Shedding our negative scripts in loving agreement can be such a useful relationship healing approach.

OK, so what this means in practice, is that a couple can agree with each other to lovingly each recognize the nature of their particular individual negative behaviour scripts – the ones which harm their loving relationship – and then they can then mutually and lovingly agree to shed negative skin after negative skin.

So, after an upset, they can follow their prior agreement and recognize the truth of the nature of each negative script – and commit to healing it.

So the whole process is like the two snakes lying next to each other shedding negative skin after negative skin, where each skin that is shed on one of the negative scripts – one of the negative patterns that harms the love between us.

Negative skin after negative skin is shed. So the time eventually comes when the two people are like two quite vulnerable skinless snakes – creatures lying there next to each other.

And then the Reward to the process arises: the point is, from that process of shedding negative script after negative script, they can then arise – together.

From that process they now have the potential to arise in love – as a Power Couple.

It’s not easy. There will be incidents along the way! – but it’s so worth it.

I am sharing this in particular because I have recently created a new Dating Site for those on a Spiritual Pathway to find love. The website is called LoveStarDating, and a special feature of the site is that it is supported by eight Astrologers and Healers whom people can avail themselves of their services if they feel that’s helpful.

I am an Astrologer and Shamanic Healer. My wife Maggie Pashley offers so many Healing Modalities online. Janell Renshaw specializes in Lesbian Relationships Astrology. Lia Cruse specializes in Gay Men love astrology. Claire Louise Knifton offers so often needed Ancestral Healing and healing Transcendance Dance. Ann Gildart is a Pendulum Dowser and Psychic answering your key questions. Kat Redwolf offers powerful wonderful Shamanic Healings. Dr Elizabeth Hendrick’s Psychic Readings are a wonderful must-have!

Part 2: Some Fascinating Examples of Love Scripts declaration from both Vedic Astrology and Psychodynamic Western Astrology:

So, having told you about the useful process you can consider truing out, if you feel it would help your relationship whether long-established or new, I now also want to share with you just a few examples of the insights I offer from both Vedic and also Western Psychodynamic Astrology – such useful insights that can so help us open our eyes and identify and see the nature of and truths of: our negative scripts for love.  

As I said, I always combine the two – Vedic plus Western Astrology – in my individual Astrology Readings and in my couples Astrology Readings.

So here’s just the tiniest sample of a very few of the insights offered by both Vedic and also Western Psychodynamic Astrology.

Here’s just a few of these as an example, but these insights can truly can help us open our eyes and see the nature of our negative love scripts – and thus we can lovingly plan and agree to heal these.  

So let’s just mention a few examples:

A few Examples from Vedic Astrology first:


The Nakshatras:

I think the first boon I would mention are the Nakshatras of Vedic Astrology. The Nakshatras are the wonderful 27-sign Lunar Zodiac of Vedic Astrology, where each Nakshatra so clearly defines the person’s love scripts, their behaviour scripts in love relationship.

In a Reading, I look first at the Nakshatra occupied by the Moon, the Ascendant and the Sun – and these can tell so much instantly as to what some of the person’s key love scripts are – insights that can be so useful for setting off on the healing path together.

For example, a key insight I could mention here is that someone with an Ashlesha Nakshatra emphasis has the potential to develop a lot of knowledge and spiritual awareness, but their tendance to be too critical would have to be healed. It would have to be healed if love is to stand a chance in the long run.

As a second Nakshatra example, Ardra Nakshatra people can tend to be ruthlessly ‘my way or the highway’ and because it’s in the sign of Gemini, they can love to denounce. The survival of their love relationship will depend on the recognition and healing of this facet.


Nakshatra Power Animals:

Each Nakshatra has a ‘Power Animal’ or ‘yoni’. Let’s take a couple of very ‘scratching the surface’ examples:

Dhanistha Nakshatra’s power animal is the Lioness and it’s ruled by Mars.

Bharani Nakshatra’s power animal is the Bull Elephant and it’s ruled by Venus.

Obviously it is crucial to know your Nakshatras, and if you’re getting together with a Martian Lioness or a Venusian Bull Elephant, it’s so helpful to know this and to work on the issues that will come up so as to heal the negative aspects.

I am being positive here. The wonderful Vedic Astrology insights can so help a couple shed the negative characteristics. They can enter on the journey of healing with so much more awareness.

If Chitra Nakshatra gets together with Vishakha Nakshatra, well this is the union of the Female Tiger with the Male Tiger. There will be bonding – but claws could fly!


Your Dara Karaka:

A person’s Dara Karaka or ‘love indicator’ is another example from the wonders Vedic Astrology can offer. The Darakaraka states the sort of person you are needing and looking for in love.

So, to cite a brief example, if Sun is your Darakaraka, this doubtless indicates that your own sense of self is weak, and therefore you feel you need a strong partner.

But the inbuilt trickster side here in this situation is that you may find your beloved Sun partner’s persona just too bossy or brutal, and of course this sets in a life time of intermittent violent quarrelling scripts.

Indeed, in this last example: the ‘snakes shedding their skins’ model that I mentioned above can be so valuable. The two of you can make sure to agree that the regular quarrel script does not lead to the ditching of all the good things that the relationship offers.

And on the matter of quarrels, if this is a pattern, the couple needs to agree that a halt must be called. A key word calls for a halt and then a cool off period.

And then all the love can have a bit of time to re-assert!


Impediments to Love:

Another key gift from Vedic Astrology is the identification of what are often known as ‘Impediments to Love’.

The Saturn Venus combination and the Saturn Mars combination, are the chief ones of these, and to have that statement offered to you  in a Reading can be so helpful for setting up awareness. See my recent videos and blogs on these two ‘blocks to love’

These ‘impediments to love’ can so usefully lend themselves to the ‘snakes shedding their negative skins’ model where the ‘impediment to love’ in the destiny of one (or both) of the partners, becomes one of the skins that have to be lovingly shed, in loving agreement between the two.

Now, A Couple of Western Astrology Examples:

So. Note that the above are just four examples from 1000 possible from Vedic Relationships astrology.

But let’s turn now to Psychodynamic Western Astrology for a tiny selection of the possible total: I offer you a few more key needed examples:


Chart Aspect Shape Astrology:

Chart aspect shape analysis can be so helpful in guiding a couple to a path of needed ‘skin shedding’.

For example, there is one chart aspect shape that is called The Cradle, and it can be so helpful to need and work with that one of the two persons is endless seeking cradling, especially if that chart aspect shape is upside down in their birth chart and thus will perpetually tip them out of the cradle they crave.

There are many other chart aspect shapes that can be usefully healed by this model, and I’d name the ‘Righteousness Rectangle’ (that can become a ‘Mystic Rectangle’) the ‘Irritation Triangle’, the ‘Irritation Rectangle’, the Shield – and many, many more.

OK, so I’m ending my tiny list of examples with the big two: Chiron and Lilith. Obviously these are great and totally needed gifts from Western Astrology that need to be added to the crucial vastness of Vedic Astrology. Yes, are the outer planets Uranus, Neptune and Pluto need to be added (and usually are).

But in addition also needing to be added for fuller and more accurate declaration are:
Chiron our existential wound


Lilith our shadow and our ‘wild side’.

These two are totally needed if our relationship scripts are to be adequately understood.

For example, Vedic astrology can tell someone they have a ‘really strong Mars in Scorpio’, but know nothing of the fact that they have Chiron conjunct that Mars – and so that Mars is not strong at all. It is severely wounded!



Chiron is our Existential Wound, in the healing of which we can become the Healer of others.

All Chiron wounds to our other planet are problems for the expression of love, and fit so well into my ‘two snakes entering into loving agreement to shed negative akin after negative skin to heal their blocks to power loving relationship.

So to take just one specimen example of ‘Chiron conjunct Mars’: this could be the man whose childhood disallowed his masculine energy (for example ‘failed fathering’ and this banished it to the shadow and the unconscious, so he brings denied violence or unconscious hostility to the relationship and has to build from scratch his masculine nature.

My ‘snakes casting their negative skins in mutual agreement for healing’ is so good to use, here.



It’s so crucial to know if Lilith is aspecting your Venus or Mars (and indeed any other planet).

I gave, above, a tiny example of a wound to a man in my Chiron section. So, now, so let’s take a tiny very partial look at an example of a wound to a woman in relationship: a woman with Lilith conjunct Moon.

Lilith is our Shadow Side – and it’s crucial to see what is buried there; what negatives? Negatives we don’t know of but these are negatives that drive our choices and actions and thoughts.

But also stuffed down into our shadow, of course is our buried power that was not allowed! Buried Power that will transform our lives if we can identify it and liberate it.

And indeed, it is absolutely crucial to note that Lilith is also our buried Wild Side.

It is so crucial for each person to know about their Lilith.

Just one of the facets of Lilith conjunct Moon is that the woman might not have had nurturing, true mothering, and indeed that the woman might have had parenting that stuffed her Wild Side into the shadow and didn’t allow it!

This was because a nice quiet girl was wanted, whereas we ALL need to know what our Wild Side is, so that we can be fully expressive of the fullness of us, and so that we can hone it and ensure that its negative features are lovingly identified and not acted out in unacknowledged feral and destructive ways when we ‘take a walk on the wild side’ and indeed fully embody the creative and assertive potential of the True Me.


Lilith Chiron and the wonderful Varga (Divisional) Charts of Vedic Astrology:

And, lastly on the note of the crucial need for each of us to identify, understand and heal and express our Lilith and Chiron destinies, I do want to say that, as an Astrologer given readings and teaching Courses, I actually extend the identification of your Lilith and Chiron scripts into the Varga Charts.

The Varga Charts are the Divisional Charts of Vedic Astrology – each of which say something quite uniquely special and wonderful about a particular area of your life.

And I must say that examining your Lilith and Chiron, and the Lilith and Chiron affected planets in your birth chart and in your Varga charts gives UTTERLY wow immensity of extra insight and awareness and vision for needed key directions of Healing of yourself AND your Relationship. Get a Reading!

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